In this episode of GFP Live with Cathy and Tom, learn how to create your own meal plan!

Follow the steps Tom reviews and you will see how easy it is to stay accountable.

Check out Episodes every Tuesday between 7:30 and 9pm!

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When our third child Joey was born, so many things changed.

No joke, I must have heard this 100x in the last few months:

“Now you’re going from man to man to zone defense.”

Things came up I did not even think about!

One of them was getting 3 car seats in Vanessa’s car.

Our car definitely had the capacity for 3 seats, but we had to put Bella’s in the 3rd row.

In an effort to not drive my hard working wife with 3 kids under 4 years old crazy, we needed to get Bella to be able to buckle herself in her car seat without help.

At first, it was not looking good.

Bella had a very tough time even holding the buckle, let alone buckling it.

I put her in and would sit there with her, sometimes for 30 minutes.

She would get frustrated and start to cry, very quickly.

I would get frustrated too.

I then realized I was going about this all wrong.

Every time Bella would try, she knew there was frustration and failure coming up.

I was giving her something to do that was not impossible, but definitely beyond her current development.

I remembered what was needed to learn a new skill.

Many times when you are learning something new, you need to practice it in small chunks first.

So that’s what we did.

I started putting the seatbelt half way in… and she would finish it.

Then only a 1/4 of the way in.

She started to love putting on her seatbelt because she was experiencing small wins.

In fact every time she got a buckle in she would yell “Bullseye!!”

After only a few days, she nailed it, all by herself.

I was not alone in this victory, both her grandmas, Coach Chris (Bella’s trainer) and Vanessa played a huge role.

The same can go for us:

Are you making things too hard?

Are you trying to do everything at once?

Set yourself up for success and commit to doing something easy.

If we try to do everything at once we are setting ourself up for failure.

Give yourself permission that the ONLY thing you need to do to achieve success is drink 1/2 your BW in water.

When you do this, you will give yourself the confidence to keep going.

Don’t commit to lose 30 pounds, commit to losing 1/2 a pound every week.

It’s more realistic - and it’s healthier.

Consistency wins every time!

From 1998-2001, I played football at Temple University.

We were not very good.

Here’s our record from when I was there:

 

• 1998: 2-9
• 1999: 2-9
• 2000: 4-7
• 2001: 4-7

That’s 12 wins in 4 seasons.

What do you want?

There are two types of people:

People who want and people who need. 

For those that want, there is no ceiling for success.

For people that need, there is a stopping point for success.

People who want are driven from within themselves.

People who need are driven from external sources.

People who want value freedom.

People who need value security.

People who want are creative

People who need are reactive

You want things because you want them - and there is no reason why you want them, there is no justification; you just want it.

The problem with needing is you think of every possible obstacle in place that justifies why you can't have or do something.

Here is the action step that is guaranteed to

put you on the path to being a wanter:

Write down what you want every day. No justifications - if you want it, put it down.

Commit to this daily.

Go and purchase a separate notebook and write in it daily

Here is a sample of a few of mine:

• I want to write a great article this morning
• I want to be more focused when I am with my kids
• I want to be pain free
• I want to get a massage every week
• I want to buy a shore house
• I want to read faster
• I want Bella to put on her own seatbelt

So we all probably want a ton of things, writing them down every day will make them clearer.

But here is the big question you need to answer:

If you want all this,

who do you need to become to get it?

On October 7th, Vanessa and I had our 3rd child, a baby boy.

Vanessa and I are truly grateful to have had 3 healthy children - it’s more than we could ever ask for.

I honestly never imagined I would have a son. 

Statistics were not on my side, as there was only a 20% chance our third kid would be a boy.

I would go into Toys-r-Us with my 2 girls and slowly walk by the trucks, action figures and sports gear, wondering if I would ever walk those aisles with a son.

Well, that time has come.

I escaped the madness to write this, but am having trouble turning this into a lesson for you.

I am honestly just so happy and grateful.

So I want to dedicate this email to the GFP team.

I want to do this because I knew I need to step away and take some time with my family.

The team stepped up big time and continues to deliver you the highest quality training and customer service, whether I am there or not.

Tom Langton who has been with me since the start of GFP is truly the heart and soul of the gym.

Joe Hartigan still amazes me how much he studies and learns and now is in a leadership role, making everyone around him better.

Bernard McKenna is always there and is as dependable as ever.

Matt Carbone is one of the brightest and most diligent trainers I have been around, he continues to grow everyday.

Gina Voorhees is the glue to GFP.

Ellen Haley makes sure your day is brighter.

New Mommy Michelle McCabe is back and better than ever.

Chris DeGeorge continues to change lives everyday from his middle school training post.

And our newest team member Karen Vitti fits like a glove.

Vanessa and I could not be more blessed to have such an amazing team at GFP.

Each of us continues to grow everyday in pursuit of providing you the best fitness and health experience possible.

We are grateful to you for giving us the platform to do something we love.

Mindset Monday will be back and better than ever next week, stay tuned!

Last week, we showed you where your energy comes from (your cells) and the 3 things your cells need to survive (water, oxygen and digestion).

Today, we’re talking about how important water is to your quality of life.

Now, it might seem obvious, but if you drink enough water - you’ll have more energy.

As one of my mentors always says that progress = happiness.

So, if you continue to make progress, you’ll continue to be happy - but it takes energy to make that progress.

And you won’t make progress if you’re tired all the time.

Since your your brain works more efficiently when hydrated, drinking more water will give you the energy you need become a better parent, student, athlete, or worker.

Water will fuel your cells with energy

70% of our bodies is made of water hence it holds the keys for  most functions we have

So if want to have more energy….drink more water

The key is connect drinking water to whats important to you

If you being a better mom is important to you, than drink more water!

If being a better athlete is important to you, drink more water!

If making more money and being more successful is important to you, drink more water!

How Much is enough?

We recommend 1/2 your Bodyweight in
ounces of water per day (at a minimum!)

Disclaimer: If you're not even close to this now, start a little slower or you will find yourself running the restroom every 15 minutes!

The best way to do this is by using a cup you know how much water it holds

For example, the shakers we sell at GFP hold 25 ounces of water.

If your goal is 75 ounces, you know you need 3 of them each day.

This is the easiest way to hydrate your way to a better life!

I am getting a little fatter and I blame no one, except my wife.

It's her fault.

I am about 240 pounds right now, but usually feel much better at 230.

It’s her fault, not mine.

I’m eating more ice cream.

But it’s her fault, not mine. I didn’t buy it (she did), and I only eat it when she does.

I’m really joking, but not really.

Vanessa is 8 months pregnant and when you’re pregnant, you eat more and gain weight, this is fact.

Your eating habits tend to change when you’re pregnant.

Plus, your emotions tend to swing when you’re pregnant, causing you to have less willpower about making the right food choices.

But what does this have to do with me?

Everything!

I spend more time with Vanessa than anyone else.

I have unconsciously picked up on these habits.

I did not say because Vanessa is pregnant I am going to eat poorly, it just happened.

But there is a reason for this and it’s proven in research.

The reality is your significant other (and other people in your social network) has a major influence on your health.

The worst-case scenario is both you and your spouse having an a unhealthy lifestyle, mainly those habits will spread to your children.

But if you’re trying to get healthy and the people closest to you are sabotaging your effort (even NOT on purpose), it becomes much harder than it needs to be.

Now, the best-case scenario is when both of you are focused on living a healthier lifestyle.

You will not only live longer and have more energy, but you’ll be passing on a healthier lifestyle to your children.

So make a decision to get healthy together!

I know when Vanessa and I are on the same page with our nutrition and exercise it is much easier to have success.

Living a healthy life is much easier with a supportive spouse.

Make the decision together to be the model of health for your family.

Make it a core value, something that’s non-negotiable.

Something that is simply the way you are.

Here is the research on how your social network can affect your health one way or the other:

http://www.precisionnutrition.com/research-friends-fat

When Bella was about 1 ½  she started with throwing herself on the ground and having tantrums

I wrote about it before and shared my experience, its was not fun

Especially since I kept hearing the terrible 2’s are not the problem,  it’s the 3s!

Doing the math in my head I calculated 2 ½ more years of tantrums

Then Vanessa told she was pregnant with our second…blank stare at first but then was elated

At a regular check up our doctor gave us strategies to deal with the tantrums

My initial response was to yell “get up” and get angry, this never worked

One of the strategies she told us was distraction

When Bella would go into the tantrum I would quickly pick her up and bring her to the window

She was always mesmerized by looking out the window and would stop the tantrum immediately

Throwing herself on the ground when she was not happy was a pattern she was adopting

I was interrupting her pattern through distraction

We all have unhealthy patterns that we have developed to deal with stress, negative emotions and fear

Some of us eat

Some of us drink

Some of us run away

Some of us get angry

Some of us get in a funk

Some of us are just unhappy

You need a strategy

A strategy that will interrupt this pattern

Here is what I want you to do

Think about something that makes you totally happy

For me,  its my girls sprinting toward me yelling DADDY! DADDY! when I get home

There is no better feeling to me

Once you have the feeling, picture it in your mind, get detailed with it

Once you have it, start tapping your thumb and ring finger repeatedly

Keep picturing your happy moment and tapping for several minutes

You may need to reinforce this a few times

Now when you go into your pattern of stress, fear and negative emotions

Start tapping

This interrupts the pattern and gets you somewhere you want to be

Give it a shot

Vanessa asked me what I wanted for my birthday.

I told her nothing; I have everything I could possibly need… and then some!

My mom asked me the same thing, same answer.

Then my birthday came and I wanted something.

I wanted to take Vanessa to the mall and buy her something.

That was what I wanted for my birthday.

I bought her a pair of shoes at the mall and then we went to dinner.

It was one of my favorite birthdays ever.

The saying its better to give than to receive holds true

I’m not sharing this to make me sound like this great person.

I just have learned where fulfillment  lies and it's not in birthdays gifts or material things.

The final and most influential of the 6 Human needs is CONTRIBUTION.

This is the need where true fulfillment in life is realized.

As I have been a student of the 6 human needs for a while now these types of decisions make more sense to me.

A few years ago I would never of wanted to buy something for someone else on my birthday.

As I study what brings us happiness and fulfillment in life I realized its your contribution to others and the world that brings true Fulfillment.

It's human nature for you to think of yourself first.

Next time you look at a group picture of you and your family or friends, where do your eyes go first?

For most people its themselves, it's not wrong - it's human.

Because I know contribution is so powerful I have trained myself to not look at myself first.

It's just a small reminder that contribution to others is where ultimate happiness and fulfillment lies.

It's certainly not easy but it's truly worth it.

The Contribution Challenge:

Send one text, email or make a call to someone to make their day better or just thank them for being in your life.

Do it once a day, every day, for a week and see how it goes.

If you do this for a year, you will have made 365 people happier!

Over the past few weeks, we've talked about our basic human needs: Significance, certainty, and uncertainty. Today, we're going to cover the last of the primal needs.

Humans all need to feel connected with someone or something.

A great example of this need is when a baby is born. The baby will not survive without love and connection from the mother.

From a chemical perspective, the mother releases a hormone called Oxytocin that satisfies this need for love/connection.

There are several ways to get love and connection - one great way is hugs.

A hug releases oxytocin that creates that feeling of love and connection. I have heard a 20 second hug is optimal!

It's important to understand that love and connection does not have to only come from another human.

It can come from pets, good habit, a sense of identity, or a personal value.

We all need love and connection.

The final 2 needs are coming up: Growth and Contribution - these needs are where we get true fulfillment in life

If we live our lives primarily feeding the first 4 needs, we will survive.

If we have growth and contribution at the top of our need structure, life will be amazing and we will thrive.

Over the next two weeks, we'll talk about how to incorporate these top tier needs into your life, so you can be happier and more fulfilled.

In the Summer of 2002, I picked up and left Philadelphia to move to San Diego.

I was 23 years old and had only been to there once in my life.

I left my friends and family, started at a college I knew nothing about for my final year and sought out a career where I had no formal education.

I had majored in business at Temple because all along I thought would be a stock broker (or something like that)

I dropped everything to become a personal trainer.

That same summer my dad got very sick and had a major heart surgery.

My final days at home were taking him out on his very short walks; it was painful to see him in that state.

I was not sure if I should leave.

Needing to complete one more year of school my parents pushed me to go.

Now my career in personal training had more meaning.

I am not sure I would be doing what I am today if my Dad had not gotten sick.

As a personal trainer I could help people be healthy and possibly avoid the pain my family went through.

Human need #2 is Uncertainty.

We all have a need for change.

Naturally we seek variety in many ways.

Variety can come from a change in where you live, going to a different restaurant, seeing a new movie, changing a job, an unexpected illness, a big decision at work etc.

Many of us do not like Uncertainty.

Uncertainty can be scary because we are stepping into the unknown.

As I said last week, one of my higher needs was certainty (something I am working on).

This basically means I am uncomfortable with Uncertainty (not knowing).

The story above was one of the more uncertain times of my life and fulfilled my need for variety like nothing else could.

This is a quote from Tony Robbins that hit home with me:

“The quality of your life is in direct proportion to the amount of UNCERTAINTY you can comfortably live with”

The key word here is comfortable.

When things change on you last minute, does it stress you out like crazy?

Do you hate change?

The one thing we all have to face is that the world is filled with Uncertainty.

Instead of trying to control everything all the time, we need to step into Uncertainty.

We need to get more comfortable with not knowing.

Seek out Uncertainty - it’s what makes us feel alive!

The 6 Human Needs is a structure I learned from Anthony Robbins.

This simple system answers the questions of why we do what we do.

It shows us how a person can grow up in total poverty with drugs and violence all around them and come out and become a successful businessperson that contributes to society

or

How a person can grow up in total security, have all the wealth, love and support they could want and become a drug addict.

These 6 needs are wired into our nervous system.

Everyone, no matter race, gender, color has these same needs.

We all find ways to meet these needs - the differences is in how we do it.

Will they be met in a positive inspiring way, or a negative destructive way?

The first 4 needs are called Primal Needs:

• Certainty: A desire to know that things are stable

• Uncertainty: Seeking variety through various ways

• Significance: Feeling special and important

• Love: Feeling connected with someone or something

The final two needs are the needs of the spirit:

• Growth: People are not satisfied unless they are growing in multiple ways: spiritually, educationally, in their relationships, businesses etc

• Contribution: The need to contribute to other people

While we need all of them, the key question is how we prioritize these needs.

We all have 2 needs that we value most.

Try to think about the 6 needs this week and select the 2 you value most.

The next several weeks we will be breaking down these needs further.

Have a great week!

Vince

I am in pain right now.

Something amazing has happened to me that has caused me pain.

Vanessa and I are having our third child. I am beyond excited, but there's one thing I need to do before the baby comes that is causing me pain.

I need to sell my truck.

I bought that truck 10 years ago with my hard earned money as a personal trainer back in San Diego.

It has never failed me, never.

Since it does not have 4 wheel drive or a legitimate back seat I am being strong armed to sell and get a more suitable truck for a family with 3 kids.

I am focused on trucks right now.

I am deciding between a Ford 5-150 and a Toyota Tundra. Now when I drive, my eyes are looking at every single truck on the road.

I am sure many of you have gone through the same thing around the time you purchase a car.

You focus on it all the time. You focus on the model, the price, the color, the interior, the dealer.

It can get almost emotional.

The third part in mastering your emotions is this:

What you focus on is what you will feel.

If you focus on your back hurting all the time, your back will hurt.

If you focus on how much your life stinks right now, that’s how you will feel about everything.

If you focus on the faults of your spouse, that’s how you’ll feel about them.

Most of the time, when we are down we are focusing on something about ourselves or something that affects us.

This can hinder your success in life and prevent us from ever really being happy.

Here is the action step:

When you find yourself focusing on yourself and its making you feel down...

Close your eyes and take 4 deep breaths.

While taking those breaths, think of another person that needs you in their life. Someone that needs your strength, help, guidance, advice, comfort.

Just shift your focus to them. Maybe think of something you can do for that person.

Shift your focus. Make it happen.

You can do it!

Last week we focused on our language and how it effects our emotions.

Remember the 3 things that drive how we feel:

• Physiology
• Focus
• Language

Today’s focus is Physiology.

When I talk about physiology, I am referring to our physical bodies.

Our Breath. Our Posture. Our Movement.

Our physical bodies are the foundation of all effective change.

Think of this:

Let’s say you are constantly stressed out and you think of negative things all the time.

Now, go to the gym (Preferably GFP 🙂 ) and get an incredible workout.

When you’re sweating like crazy after working really hard, how do you feel?

I’ll bet that during and after your workout you didn’t feel stressed at all.

You temporarily changed your state of mind by effecting your physical body.

Here is another example that is even easier (This is a great one for students):

Sit very slumped in your chair.

Look down.

Round your shoulders .

Take short breaths from your chest.

Make a face of a stressed out person.

NOW TRY THIS!

SIT UP TALL

FEET FLAT ON THE FLOOR

HEAD UP

SHOULDERS BACK, CHEST OUT

TAKE A DEEP BREATH INTO YOUR BELLY

BLOW IT OUT HARD

SMILE

Your posture will drive how you feel.

The better your posture, the happier you will be.

Being physically fit, having good posture and understanding how to breathe properly will help you control your emotions.

It will make you happier.

The quality of our lives is controlled by our emotions

There are 3 forces that control your emotions

Physiology: Physical body, breath, posture, movement

Focus: Whatever you focus on you feel

Language: The words you use

Today’s focus will be Language

Too often I hear patterns of negative debilitating language(Myself included)

If we change our language we can change our emotions

“I cant do this”

“I will never be able to do that”

“I just don’t have the time”

“This wont work”

“This is hard”

All these statements drive home negative emotions like sadness, anxiety and frustration.

The words we use will change our emotions

When we say things

“I can do this”

“I will make the time”

“This will work”

“What a great opportunity this challenge is”

It changes everything

Your perception of the exact same event can change from a negative to a positive with minor tweaks of the words you use

The more you do this the happier you’ll be

Change your language, change your emotions

Dear GFP Family,

One of my biggest challenges is deciding who to bring on as part of the GFP team.

I truly value each of you as our clients and members of our family, so we only want the best quality people in charge of your most precious resource - your health.

As you all know, the biggest differentiator between GFP and other gyms is the quality of people that we have on our team.

Not a day goes by where I do not get a compliment of how great our team is.

I am proud to say we are growing as a company and needed to bring on a new team member.

Being leaders in the fitness industry, we had hundreds of aspiring trainers lining up to work at GFP.

Our interview process in very very extensive.

Email evaluations, phone interviews, interviews with me based on our core values, interviews with the GFP Team, spending a day a at GFP just observing, going to lunch with the GFP team. It’s an exhausting process for us and for the new potential team member.

After the dust settled, the entire GFP Team made a unanimous decision to bring on Brian Marcinczyk as our newest team member.

During the entire process Brian displayed the ALL the Core Values we look for to be part of the GFP Team.

The most important aspect of being part of this team is a person that has strong character. One that is willing to do whatever it takes to make a difference in the lives of other people, to continue to improve everyday and to display an ultimate level of professionalism.

Brian Marcinczyk has these qualities.

For the past week Brian has been working very hard with Coach Joe and the rest of the GFP Team to learn everything he needs to know to be a successful coach.

His enthusiasm has been extraordinary and he has picked things up very fast

Brian comes to us as a lifelong resident of South River in Middlesex County.

While at South River High School, Brian was a three sport athlete in football, basketball, and baseball, and was captain of the basketball and baseball teams during his senior year.

After high school, Brian attended Middlesex County College where he was a member of the baseball team and received his Associate's Degree in Physical Education.

Following this, Brian transferred to Coastal Carolina University in Conway, SC.

While at Coastal, he was a member of the club baseball team and received his Bachelor's Degree in Recreation and Sport Management.

During his senior baseball season, Brian suffered an unfortunate ACL injury that cut his final year short.

Due to Brian's work ethic and his own Growth Mindset, he fully recovered from this injury and surgery in seven and a half months.

Along with his educational and athletic background, Brian has also coached many youth athletes ranging from Pop Warner football, recreation league basketball, and Varsity High School baseball.

Brian recently passed the prestigious National Academy of Sports Medicine Personal training Certification.

He is slated to take the very difficult GFP in house exam in the next few weeks.

Please respond to this email and welcome YOUR newest GFP trainer Brian Marcinczyk.